What should Africa call me?

When I’ve been in the village for too long

I’m just like,

When someone tries to cross me

I’m just like,

When I stumble upon a fight or other illegal activity

I want to watch so I try to hide like,

When a guy tells me he loves me

I’m just like,

How I walk up to a street vendor

What I want to say to almost every African I meet

My reaction when I see mzungus getting on matatus at night

When my roommate wants to order delivery

I’m just like,

When I meet a prostitute at the bar

I’m just like,

When I’m packing to go home

And I realize there’s not enough room in my suitcase,